Chapter One Rude awakening
by Fire and Ice2
Summary: Jack wakes up after an explosive party- in Genera Hammonds office but he's not alone. He soon learns he's urgently needed but it yet to be briefed


Jack rolled over and groaned.  
  
There were two things on the Colonels mind; one was why on this earth did he feel the urge to drink so much at the Halloween party last night and two. were where his pants?  
  
He kept his eyes shut; he had no idea where he'd fallen a sleep. Then a sudden thought hit Mr O'Neill as his arm jarred into something- who had he fallen a sleep with.  
  
His eyes sprang open to reveal the ceiling, he was in the generals' office no less, but he was underground so whether it was daylight or not was anyone's guess.  
  
Jack slowly came to the conclusion that he was sleeping on the floor, since he could see the proud pine desk, and was staring up at the valiant US of A flag.  
  
There was a murmuring sound as he saw the body that was next to him materialise. His heart almost stopped as his body gripped it's self with shock.  
  
"O'Neill, I believe we are in the generals office. Why?"  
  
Jack didn't move a muscle; he whispered to the jaffa quietly and tired not to make his mouth movements obvious. The place was riddled with video camera and he bet Sam and Daniel would have fun discussing this little mishap.  
  
"Teal'c?" he called out of the side of his mouth, with his right hand still sweeping over the floor- Mother of Mercy, where was his pants?  
  
Teal'c replied, "I am here"  
  
"Why am I half naked?"  
  
"I do not know" the jaffa answered honestly. Jack allowed a sly look to the left. Teal'c was quiet the morning picture. He still had his matted blond wig on, the bright pink blamonge shaped dress on with artificial butterflies of green and blue stuck to it. Not far away was a child crafted magic wand, and a pair of glass slippers also appeared on the scene. One more obviously than the other as that one was in Jacks crotch.  
  
Teal'c (as if it wasn't more obvious than a flashing sign on the road to hell) went as Cinderella. Jack remembered how surprised he was with the nimble and agile dancing demonstrated by the jaffa last night.  
  
But that was unimportant. The light in the room were all off except the Generals lamp- did he have to put this in a report. Oh he didn't care- Urika! His hands felt a line pair of tights. He picked the garment off the floor- they were bottle green and seriously crotch grabbing.  
  
Jack looks shamefully down for a second at his Spiderman boxer shorts- yes he lost a bet on poker night. He actually lost several bets, which is also why he had to dress as Robin Hood.  
  
He squirmed his way into the tights, no longer caring who was watching. Teal'c looked on intently, before he rose up into the cold dark room.  
  
Jack followed; he faced his pal and an empty wall. Teal'c looked at him horror struck. "What? Come on I don't look that." he turned o face the Jaffas view, Carter clicked on the Polaroid just as he turned. The flash half blinded O'Neil.  
  
Sam looked like the Cheshire cat who got the cream when the camera spewed out the photograph. She raised her hand; as she did her sleeveless dress go a little lower. Sam had gone as Tinkerbell, her outfit was accurate and tight. just like his tights. Also like his tights, the outfit really left nothing to the imagination.  
  
"Lets see what the trainees make of this one, Sir"  
  
"Carter!" his face screwed in the usual protest.  
  
Daniel smirked.  
  
"Oh come on Daniel, you look like the brave little toaster"  
  
"I'm a robot- a ROBOT!" Daniel sniffed before running back to the changing rooms in a huff. Carter and Jack shrugged.  
  
"General Hammond wants you in the briefing room, ASAP"  
  
"What like this?!" he exclaimed  
  
Carter was already pulling away- not like she'd given him much of a choice.  
  
"He's found something interesting, we have to go now to px3 798, now!" she called from over her shoulder.  
  
Even though Carter and Daniel had left, a small gathering of officers was still staring in aw at the fairy tale princess and the manly man in tights. Hesitantly Jack began to edge his hands over his crotch, seemed as though that was all the officers were staring at.  
  
Him and Teal'c stepped out trying to keep their dignity. Teal'c had no such luck considering his flowery "elegant" dress was tucked into his clear tights. But most of the on lookers turned to look at the walls of the hallways when noticing the jaffa hadn't got any underwear on!  
  
Jack strolled along avoiding glances and thinking- what could be so urgent that he'd have to stay dressed as Robin Hood for it? 


End file.
